Your kids have moved out of the house, you’re retired or soon to be, and if you’re divorced, or your spouse has passed, you’re no longer primarily a mom, or a career woman, or a wife. So, you may be asking yourself, “Who am I now, and what can I do with my life?”
Carolyn Myss, spiritual teacher, and author of the book Archetypes, says this can catapult a woman into an archetypal crisis. The old archetypal patterns no longer fit, and at this stage, women are often not yet identified with a new archetype; the new role that reflects who they are, or who they are meant to become in the world. This can be a very unsettling and challenging time, leaving one unsure as to who they are and what purpose they have. Growing pains are not just for the young!
Listening to Inner Prompts
Often, this is when the little voice within begins niggling that there must be more to life, along with the feeling that there is something that they can provide, or do, or experience, now that so many obligations have been lifted. Many women in the third stage of life feel a strong desire to give back in some way.
What a glorious and rich opportunity this presents! These years are perhaps the first time in a woman’s adult life when has the luxury of focusing entirely on herself. No need to compare and juggle schedules, conflicting family interests, and career demands. This can be a time of great awakening, of exploring new opportunities, and resurrecting old dreams that are so often left by the wayside in order to meet life’s unending intrusions.
It’s a time of choice: to embrace the uncertainty of something new and follow growth or default into the safety of old habits. The soul urges us forward to explore new aspects of ourselves, while the ego may pull back in fear, assuming it’s scary or difficult.
New Potential
If you’ve always been a Caregiver, an archetype many women embody, perhaps it’s time to try on the Explorer archetype. There are many travel groups designed for solo and group travelers aged 50 and over. Some of these groups are centered around exercise: walking, hiking, biking and even snorkeling! Others are focused on culture: cooking, art, or music classes in foreign countries and throughout the US.
Are you a horticulturalist? How about a trip to England to see the many varieties of rhododendrons that bloom there. There are classes at home and abroad for every interest and level of ability. River cruises, ocean cruises, and lake journeys are all available in the US and abroad.
Are you perhaps ready to trade in the Jester cap and try your hand at delving into the Sage; willing to forgo the jokes and light hearted fun to find more depth and meaning in life, to search out answers to the eternal questions of ‘why am I here, and what was I born for?’ This could mean embarking on a vision quest in nature to dive deeply into oneself or begin studying some of the great philosophers and spiritual texts.
This might be an opportune time to go on a retreat, where taking time away from the familiar often promotes deeper reflection and profound realizations. Many have found new direction in life by taking some reflective time away from normal routines.
Small Steps Often Reap Big Dividends
The steps into a greater sense of self, along with freedom and joy this brings, don’t have to be dramatic, they can be taken with care and consideration. What have you always longed to do? Do it! Take the trip or the singing lessons, or piano, or guitar.
Get a friend or two, or family member to join you to visit some of the majestic national, or local parks that you’ve always wanted to see. Perhaps the journey is taken right from your desk as you compile your memoir and through the effort come to know yourself better while also leaving a lovely legacy for your family and friends.
What we all hunger for from the soul out is authenticity, to know and explore ourselves, and for many this may be the first real chance in life this is possible. Later, when it’s time to settle into the comfy chair by the fire, you’ll have great memories and pictures of fun times and new friends to enjoy, rather than regrets. This is your opportunity – seize it!
Let’s Have a Conversation:
Have you identified a new archetype that is emerging in your life, or one that you feel especially drawn to at this time? Maybe the archetype is hidden in some of your as-yet-to-be-realized dreams. What have you always thought would be a wonderful thing to do or place to visit? Please share your dreams so we can cheer you on!